Writing Matters

Over-the-top newsletter list hygiene: "Do us a favor and unsubscribe"

As a long-time newsletter publisher, I am familiar with the reasons to "thin the herd" of subscribers who aren't reading the newsletter or responding to offers. A clean e-mail list means:

• Fewer spam complaints or bounces
• Accurate open and click-through rates
• The opportunity to focus on subscribers who will convert to sales or take action

But can e-mail list hygiene go too far?  Last week, I was told I was costing a newsletter money and asked to either start reading or opt out. Take a look at the e-mail I got from "ABCD Organization" (not the real name...)

From: ABCD
To: [email protected]
Subject: ABCD Newsletter Opt-Out. PLEASE READ!

Thank you for taking a minute to read this e-mail from the ABCD Organization (ABCD).

You are currently a subscriber to our monthly newsletter, ABCD eNews. If you are an ABCD member or an active reader of our newsletter, this e-mail doesn't apply to you and I thank you for your support.

If you receive ABCD eNews but do not open and read it, I'd like to ask you for a favor. Please use the "Unsubscribe" button at the end of this e-mail to remove yourself from our mailing list. The ABCD is a 503(c)(6) not-for-profit membership organization with limited resources and we have to pay for each issue of ABCD eNews e-mailed each month. If you're not reading what we send you, you'll be doing us a favor by taking this opportunity to unsubscribe by clicking on the "Unsubscribe" button below:

Thank you and please contact me if you have any questions.

John Doe
(contact info omitted)

I think ABCD bungled this opportunity to reconnect with eNews subscribers, and the "do us a favor" wording is really off-putting. (Maybe ABCD could find a cheaper way to distribute the newsletter?)

You can send a list clean-up e-mail to subscribers without destroying your relationship with them, as Kipp Chambers of the SmallBusinessTechTips.com blog has explained in his excellent post "Panic: Email Marketing List Maintenance Done Right." (His post is about Panic, a company that makes software for the Mac, not panic, the feeling that keeps you up at night.)

Chambers included this screenshot of the "We're Cleaning Up Our List" e-mail he received from Panic (click to enlarge). It's personal and friendly: "We love e-mailing our customers..." and "... click the sad button..." It invites subscribers to unsubscribe if they're no longer interested in the newsletter content, but it doesn't begrudge them a spot on the mailing list the way ABCD does.

As always, I am interested in your opinion. Post a comment or e-mail me to let me know what you think of ABCD's opt-out e-mail and strategy. If you would be willing to share your e-mail list hygiene methods or your own "We're Cleaning Up Our List" e-mail, that would be great.

 

"Thank you for your message; however, I'm not going to read it."

This out-of-office e-mail landed in my inbox a few days ago. I don't know "Bob" personally; he's a member of a Yahoo! group I follow. (To preserve privacy, I have changed all identifying info in the e-mail.)

I think Bob's e-mail is one of a kind, and I've been following the out-of-office genre for a while. (See my earlier post: Out-of-Office E-Mails: T.M.I. or too little?)

I'd like to know your opinion. Do you think this a practical and polite out-of-office e-mail?

Subject: Thank you for your message; however, I'm not going to read it. See important contact information below
 
I will be out of the office starting 02/07/2011 and will not return until 02/16/2011.
I am away on vacation and will not be answering e-mails received during this time.
For research grants please contact John Smith, [email protected], (800)123-4567 x 11223
For research agreements and intellectual property please contact Jane Doe, [email protected], (800)123-4567 x 22334
For ABA, BCB, CDD please contact Susan Brown, [email protected], (800)123-4567 x 55588
For knowledge mobilization please contact Fred White, [email protected], (800)123-4567 x 99887
For all other matters or if you need immediate assistance please contact Ann Johnson, [email protected], (800)123-4567 x58258

In order to manage e-mail, I will not be reading e-mails received during my absence. If your e-mail is still urgent upon my return on February 16, please send it to me again.

Thanks for helping manage e-mail insanity.

Bob

In my earlier post, I listed these four items as required information for an out-of-office e-mail:

• How long you'll be gone. Use calendar dates, not just day of the week.
• How often or whether you'll respond to e-mail or voice mails at all while you're gone. Knowing whether you'll respond at all during your time out of the office will help you colleagues and customers decide what to do in case of a work emergency, for example.
• Who to contact for what while you're away. Provide specific names, e-mails, and phone numbers.
• How soon you'll respond to e-mails when you've returned.

Bob has supplied all the required information, but has he gone around the bend in asking people to resend their e-mails to him upon his return? In your opinion, is it OK to announce that you won't be reading any of the e-mails sent to you while you're away. Let me know what you think. (I will read your e-mails.)

-- Leslie O'Flahavan

Do You Write Customer Service E-Mail That Rates a Perfect 10?

We all know that a good customer service e-mail is one and done: it answers the customer’s questions or solves the customer’s problems so there’s no need for a second round of contact. A great customer service e-mail goes beyond one and done: it anticipates related questions a customer might have and answers them, too. It has a personal and professional tone.

But what’s a perfect customer service e-mail? It’s in the details. A perfect e-mail is easy to read, has no spelling or grammar errors, and has a subject line that does the heavy lifting—previews the e-mail’s content. It offers other sources of help and makes it easy for the customer to contact you.

Download our article How to Write a Customer Service E-Mail That Rates a Perfect Ten (PDF). In it, we've dissected an e-mail exchange between a customer and a customer service agent from a company we’ve called AutoBackup. We’ve identified the characteristics we think make this e-mail ideal. The article also includes "Tips for Writing the Perfect Customer Service E-Mail," so you too can write an e-mail that rates a perfect ten.

Download How to Write a Customer Service E-Mail That Rates a Perfect Ten, which was originally published in this month's issue of SupportWorld magazine.

 

Why an Order Confirmation E-Mail Must Have an Explicit Subject Line

Holiday season is upon us. Many of us will be spending big bucks ordering from online retailers. So all you companies out there that use e-mail to confirm purchases, I'm begging you - use an explicit subject line. (I don't mean X-rated ...)

Please do not send me a confirmation e-mail like the one I received yesterday from the Weinberg Center for the Arts, after I'd spent $207.50 on concert tickets. Here's the subject line:

Thank You for your order. ( WEIN - 0000000000012345 / 987654 )

For several reasons, this subject line is less than helpful:

• It doesn't identify what I ordered. 
• It doesn't identify who I ordered from.
• It includes an impractically long confirmation number. Just imagine if I had to call the Weinberg Center and read them that number. "Wait, I'm counting the zeros ..."

These subject lines are much better:

• Your Lindt USA Order [Number 1234567] Confirmation  [#98765]
• Order shipped - SheetMusicPlus Order #12192
• Frontier Reservation #ABCDE - May 01
• Your Amazon.com order has shipped (#002-1234567-9876543)

So, if you send me a confirmation e-mail, use the subject line to help me identify:

• Who I bought from. Of course, the sender's name helps me identify this, but the subject line should include this information too.
• What I bought.
• What has just happened or will happen with my order: confirmed, shipped, delayed, etc.
• How to refer to my order. And please don't make me try to handle 15-digit order ID numbers loaded with leading or trailing zeros. If the order number must be long, use hyphens to break it into groups, as Amazon did.  

If you send me a good subject line, I can be a good customer. I will be more likely to likely to:

• Wait patiently for my purchase to arrive.
• Resist the urge to call or e-mail again just to check on my order.
• Use the order ID number properly if I do have to contact you for help or returns.

What do you think? Please comment to share the subject lines you've received in confirmation e-mails, and let us know whether you think they were effective.

-- Leslie O'Flahavan

 

Results of our Client's Survey on E-Mail Writing Principles

Earlier this month, I delivered our half-day e-mail writing course—How to Write E-Mail That Gets Results—for a large corporation (2,000 employees) that provides research services. At the end of the course, after participants had discussed many e-mail samples and completed course activities on how to organize e-mail for easy reading, write a must-open subject line, and edit for conciseness, I distributed our Survey on E-Mail Writing Principles. In this Survey, course participants rate the importance of various writing principles, such as "Change the subject line when the topic of the e-mail exchange changes." Completing the Survey can be the first step their company takes to develop an e-mail communication policy or best practices guide.  I tallied the Survey results and let my client know which e-mail writing principles their employees felt strongly about and which ones didn't matter much. 

Subject line, spelling, punctuation mattered most 
Click the thumbnail below to review my clients' Survey results. As you'll see, the 37 respondents were passionate about correctness. The principles "Use conventional spelling" and "Use conventional punctuation" scored a 4.4 and 4.6 respectively (on a 5-point scale where 5 = Essential and 1 = Unimportant). The only principle that earned a 5 from every respondent was "Use a clear, complete subject line that announces the point of the e-mail." Which principle received the lowest score, a measly 2? "Ask permission to forward messages."

Which e-mail principles matter most to you?
I'm interested in your ratings, too. Complete our Survey on E-Mail Writing Principles online, and let me know what you think.  I'll update you on the online Survey results in a blog post next month. I'm curious about the portrait of Writing Matters readers that will emerge from this Survey.

You can also download the Survey as a PDF to use with your colleagues.

-- Leslie O'Flahavan

With a Bad Subject Line, the Rest is Academic

Want to know how not to write a subject line, especially in customer service e-mail? Read the e-mail, below. I'd just sent Academic Superstore (which sells deeply discounted software to teachers and students) this e-mail question: "I'd like to buy InDesign for my daughter who is in 11th grade. What proof do you need of her eligibility to purchase the software at the special academic discount?"

Here's the answer:

From: Academic Superstore [[email protected]]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Academic Superstore

Thank you for your interest in Academic Superstore!  To establish eligibility with us, please place your order FIRST either via our website www.AcademicSuperstore.com or by phone at 800-817-2347.  When your order is complete, you will be provided with an order number.   The SECOND step is to scan and email or fax your proof of academic eligibility to our Eligibility Department for review.  You can do this by scanning or taking a digital picture and emailing to [email protected], or faxing to 866-947-4525.

Forms of acceptable proof of eligibility include (but are not limited to):

• Currently dated student or faculty ID
• Current course schedule or tuition/fee receipt
• Recent Report Card (K-12 Students)
• [Four more forms of proof omitted here ...]

It typically takes the Eligibility Department 3-6 hours to process eligibility, and if you’re placing an order with 2nd Day or Next Day Air, we strongly advise that you place your order by phone.

Regards,

Eligibility Department
Academic Superstore

Overall, this is a B- or C+ e-mail:

• It answers my question about proof. (A recent report card will do.)
• It anticipates the other questions I'm likely to ask. (Which comes first - eligibility or purchase?)
• It's adequately upbeat (Thank you for your interest in Academic Superstore!) and polite (Regards).

But the subject line earns a failing grade. Because it contains nothing more than the name of the retailer (which also appears in the from line), this subject line fails to help the reader do e-mail triage. When faced with crowded inboxes, readers want to "sort the wounded." To do so, they rely on the subject line to help them answer three essential questions:

1. What is this e-mail about?
2. When should I read it?
3. Do I have to read this e-mail at all?

The Academic Superstore subject line fails on all three counts:

1. I can't tell that the e-mail is about how to prove eligibility.
2. I have no sense about whether the e-mail is time sensitive. I can't tell, for example, whether proof of eligibility is required within 24 hours of purchase.
3. I'm more likely to make the wrong decision and skip or delete this e-mail because the subject line fails to help me understand that this is an answer to my question. In fact, the subject line could easily cause me to mistake this customer service e-mail for a marketing piece. If I delete this e-mail without reading it, I'm likely to call Academic Superstore to ask about how to prove eligibility, thereby causing their customer service department to interact with me twice. I'll be costing them money!

So what should the subject line be? How about Proving Eligibility for Academic Superstore Discount. How would you rewrite the subject line? Post your revised subject line as a comment or send it to me and I'll post it for you.

-- Leslie O'Flahavan