Need to hire a freelaner? I've got just the wirter for you.

We receive job queries from freelance writers all the time. Usually these queries are direct, clear, energetic, and graceful. They make me think "Wow. I want to hire this person for my next project."

But when I received this e-mail in my [email protected] inbox yesterday, I was speechless.

Subject: Info, I am freelane writer John

Hi info, I am John Doe [not his real name], a former news repoter and seasoned book author I've published 12 books. And now I am a freelane writer professional online wirting for a wide range. I an online everyday and want to be your writer. Please add me on your writer list and assign me work.

Best Regards

John Doe

Do you think he wonders why his "Hi info" e-mails don't lead to freelance work? Needless to say, I won't be asking him for a writing sample.

-- Leslie O'Flahavan

Comments

[David Kay]

"Seasoned" with bourbon?

[Val S.]

This kind of bad writing immediately makes me think of spam-and-scam emails. Many writers and editors would find it hard not to respond and point out all the corrections - and maybe an opening like that is all the sender (hacker?) really wants.

[Leslie O'Flahavan]

This is a great comment, Val. I too wondered if this was a genuine e-mail from an inept writer or something more invasive. I had to grin at your suggestion that most writers and editors would be so annoyed at the errors in this e-mail that they would be compelled to either correct the mistakes or humble the writer.
"Can't...resist...urge...to...fix...bad..writing..."

[Margaret Elwood]

Yikes! The combination of intrusiveness, shamelessness, and bad writing made me pull out my dictionary to see whether I could use the word "effrontery" in this comment. Yes!